So there I was....

[Wormydog1724]

Knee deep in a pile of llama manure with nothing on but a yellow duck floaty. It had suddenly become apparent that I was in no shape to fly the plane nor to bed the famous actress. Hell just two hours ago I was having chicken fights with a midget and I lost!

Oh man now THAT was a quinceanera I will not forget.

 

[Matt1911]

When I woke up, I took the rope off my neck, pulled my pants up and got the hell outta there.
Barmitzfas.... what are you gonna do.

 

[dennishoddy]

I wake up every morning with a regimen of waving my arms and legs around in circles. If I don't feel rubber, I know I'm not in a body bag, and its safe to get up and go about my business for the day.

 

[KurtM]

So there I was, surrounded by 1000 starving cannibals, the river being my only escape! Grabbing my Swiss army knife in one hand and my canoe in the other, I proceeded to carve my way through a wall of human flesh. They did get my partner though. They turned him into bouillabaisse. I think he would have like that, he was French.